No matter how much you love your significant other, you need to learn how to organize a small home living with a messy boyfriend so you don’t go insane. Especially if you just moved in together, you’re going to be learning a lot about each other. Like you probably thought you knew your boyfriend… but when you move in together it takes your relationship to a whole new level.
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How To Deal With A Messy Boyfriend
If you want to avoid unnecessary stress in a relationship, you need to learn how to deal with a messy boyfriend. You’d be surprised at how much strain it can alleviate when you don’t feel like you’re picking up after someone.
How Do I Tell My Boyfriend To Be More Organized?
The first part of dealing with a messy boyfriend is learning the best way for you to tell your boyfriend to be more organized. Telling someone they need to be more organized can be just as difficult as telling them they should care more about their appearance. Since everyone has their own organization system, creating one as a couple is a unique challenge.
Plus there are going to be things that you care about organizing a certain way that your boyfriend doesn’t and vice versa. If your boyfriend organizes his own stuff, but doesn’t keep shared areas organized, maybe he just doesn’t understand the system. Make sure you create a system that works for both of you!
Approach the conversation using “I” statements, letting your boyfriend know how you feel. The last thing you want to do is make your boyfriend feel attacked. Rememeber that you’re a team and you need to find something that works for both of you.
How Do I Tell My Boyfriend He Needs To Clean?
If you’re wondering how do I tell my boyfriend he needs to clean, the first step is letting him know that you don’t feel like the house is clean enough. Sometimes the problem isn’t that your boyfriend isn’t organized, but that he just doesn’t clean.
When you move in with someone, it’s normal to go through a period where you learn to adjust to each other’s standards. The best thing you can do is be honest and tackle it as a team. You should also set a standard of cleanliness. When my boyfriend and I moved in together, he was still cleaning everything with clorox wipes… so I had to teach him a few things. I couldn’t get mad at him for something he didn’t know was bothering me, I had to tell him that I had a different standard for cleaning. And trust me, it doesn’t happen overnight.
How Do You Survive Living With A Slob?
If you find that you’re asking yourself, how do you survive living with a slob? you’ll be happy to know that I have a few tips for you. Living by these “rules” has helped me and my boyfriend so much when it comes to keeping an organized home.
Don’t Be Your Boyfriend’s Maid
You can actually make the problem worse if you keep picking up after your boyfriend, so don’t be your boyfriend’s maid! I know it can be tough to hear and I get it, I do. When it’s the end of the day and his dirty socks are lying around again, you just don’t have the energy to ask him to pick them up. But in the long run, it’s better to communicate what bothers you and what you would prefer to see. Remember, you just moved in with someone who’s used to living on their own. He probably only cleaned up before you or his friends came over.
Divvy Up The Chores
One of the best things you can do to keep your house organized when living with a messy boyfriend is to divvy up the chores. The best way to do this is to make a list of all the daily, weekly, and monthly chores, and divvy up who does what. Some chores aren’t necessarily a 1 for 1 either, you can weigh their worth depending on how much your significant other hates doing a certain chore. If your boyfriend’s love language is acts of service, this is a great way to find out how much they value the chores you do!
For example, my boyfriend hates going grocery shopping, so he puts a lot of value on that chore. To him, it’s worth doing the laundry, vacuuming, mopping, and doing the dishes. Sounds like a steal, right? But that’s how much he hates grocery shopping. So when you divvy up the chores, figure out what chores you value the most and what chores you would “trade” for your partner to do that chore you hate. The most important part? You have to trust that your boyfriend will actually do his chores. He may need a reminder here and there, but you also have to treat him like the adult he is.
{Related post: 43 Acts Of Service Love Language Ideas}
Don’t Rely On Gender Norms
Another key piece of advice, don’t rely on gender norms. If they work for you, great! But don’t feel confined to arbitrary rules that someone made up hundreds of years ago. Like I hate folding laundry and doing the dishes, so my boyfriend does them. But I know plenty of happy couples where the woman does all the laundry, dishes, cooking, etc. You know, the “typical” female role. But honestly, once you throw gender norms out the window and figure out what works for you as a couple, you’ll be much happier.
How To Organize A Small House With No Storage
Figuring out how to organize a small house with no storage might be one of the most stressful activities out there. I mean, if there’s no storage, where do you put all your stuff? It’s time for you and your boyfriend to get organizing.
Purge Your Stuff
Listen, if you feel like you’re struggling to organize a small house with no storage… the best thing you and your boyfriend can do for yourselves is purge your stuff. I hate to say it, but at some point, no amount of organization hacking is going to save you from going through everything and donating or selling what you don’t need. Determining your storage priorities first can make this so much easier.
So if you’re short on space in your small house, make sure you’re not holding onto unnecessary items. Easier said than done, but it feels so good when you finally get rid of the junk you don’t use. Plus you might find that your boyfriend has an easier time staying organized with less stuff in the house 😉 .
Create Habits
Now that you’ve gotten rid of all the excess stuff you don’t use, it’s time to find a place for everything and create habits to stay organized. The key to success with this is once you decide where you’re going to start keeping something, you actually have to store it there! If you’re going to take the time to create an organization system, you may as well make use of it.
If you’re boyfriend starts laying stuff down the moment he walks in the door, it’s so helpful to have something next the door where you can hang up keys, a hat, coat, etc. Plus using wall space is a great way to stay organized without cluttering up entry tables.
Create A Messy Zone
In order to stay organized, sometimes you need to create a messy zone. It sounds crazy, but when you have a designated place you can throw things that you just don’t have time to deal with, you’re home will definitely stay more organized.
Try to stick to one messy zone and go through it once a week to make sure things don’t get out of hand. You and your boyfriend can do this together since you’ll both be contributing to the mess!
Overall, remember that you’re in this together. You’re creating a life together and have to figure out what works for you as a couple. There’s going to be some give and take, so be patient. You’ve got this.
This post was all about how to organize a small home living with a messy boyfriend.
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